Monday, November 17, 2008
She will always live in my heart
It happens gradually, I get kind of cranky then I get down right moody. I start to snap at those around me and think oh it is just PMS. I will start then get over it. It happens each month. But this time it just hangs on and I get crabbier and crabbier. What is wrong with me? All at once it hits me three years ago this week our baby went to the arms of Jesus with out me. All I have left are the ultra sound pictures that prove that yes my baby did exist. She was here and I will see her again. I cry then pull out my small box of memories and cry some more. I call my mom and cry with her, then I curl up in bed and get cozy. As I begin to understand the pain and get in touch with the pain the moodiness and crankiness disappear sadness is left the pain as well but after a few days it begins to clear to and I know I will go on. My daughter will always have a huge place in my heart sometimes I feel her with pain and sometimes with longing for the day I will see her again, but she is always there. I miss you my little one your mommy loves you.